Home > education, positive parenting, social-emotional, temperament > HELP! I need some direction!!

HELP! I need some direction!!

February 9th, 2012

Did you hear it? Could you hear your own words in what Mary was saying in this months podcast? Did you find yourself saying “She’s talking about MY child! My LIFE!”

I Love Love Love sharing about Temperament. I have been climbing the walls WAITING for the podcast to come out so you could all hear it. And now it’s here and I have so much to share ……. that I’m at a loss for words…. no really…. I have no idea where to begin!

Do you want to hear about the Intense and Feisty child?  Or the Shy and Fearful one? Or maybe you have a Flexible Easy Going child and want to make sure they don’t get lost in the crowd!

Understanding temperament is like being able to ‘see in’ to the why of children’s behavior. Why do they scream loudly? Why do they cower and tuck their head? Why do they take so long to make a decision? How do I COPE!

There is so much to SHARE but I need your help to tell me where to START!!!

Listen to Mary if you haven’t and then let me know your burning questions about what she said!  If you don’t help me – I’ll start without you!

http://blogs.extension.iastate.edu/scienceofparenting/2012/02/01/episode-12-how-to-parent-spirited-children

Lori

education, positive parenting, social-emotional, temperament , , , , ,

  1. Jen
    | #1

    I don’t know where to start. Maybe the child who resorts to violence of biting or hitting his brother or sister if he gets frustrated with them. Or the loud obnoxious tone of voice my daughter uses instead of her nice indoor voice. Or even how easily she bursts into tears at the slightest frustrating “I can’t do this” moment.
    Pick one or all. Please. :)

  2. lhayungs
    | #2

    Sounds like you ‘understand’ their temperament! Way to go. One of the next steps is to give them some ‘tools’ to work with what they have. (changing their temperament is not going to happen so lets find some ways to work with it).

    Quick tools to start with:
    1-Help them recognize what they feel: “I can hear you are getting frustrated because you are whining” or “I see that you are angry because you are clenching your fists” AND are there any signals that even happen earlier? (red creeping up the neck, quick breathing or even holding their breath)
    2- Show them what you want them to do instead: You may need to take several deep breaths yourself, talk softer, wiggle and relax your fingers, smile or shake/relax your shoulders. Help them to ‘visually’ see a different response.

    Helping them to begin to recognize what happens before they get to the boiling over may begin to help them calm down before the explosion happens.

    Thanks for sharing!!!

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