Join us in welcoming a new guest blogger Barb Dunn Swanson to the Science of Parenting. Barb joined our Iowa State University Extension Human Sciences team this past summer. She brings a wealth of extension experiences from working in the youth and families field in North Carolina and Iowa. Barb will share her thoughts on the importance of giving children and family the gift of “presence” more than the gift of “presents”.
Do you feel like the holidays seem to roll around faster and faster each year? Am I telling my age when I declare that time seems fleeting? I do enjoy the break we get during the holidays to re-connect with family and friends and to get re-energized.
Not every family has the same experience at the holidays. Some families will be out of work, creating hardships and some grief. Some may be dealing with the recent loss of a loved one, and that too creates grief. Through all of this, our care and comfort of one another can be a blessing.
One of the traditions many families share is gift giving. The holidays are the time of year we can help children and youth learn the gift of generosity. Generosity is learned through role modeling. Children and youth learn so much by observing the behaviors of those around them. The language they use, body language and self -expression is all learned. As adults, we can send strong messages through what we say, what we do and how we treat one another.
During the holiday season, instead of giving gifts that may need to purchased, wrapped and delivered, maybe we can re-think our gift giving strategy. What if we were to give a skill or a helping hand to someone we care for? Could we offer our TIME, to wrap someone’s holiday gifts? Could we offer to address Christmas cards for someone? Could we offer to go to the grocery store or shopping mall and shop alongside someone who may need extra time or attention? Could we spend a day at the senior center and visit and listen to the stories of the residents? These are the priceless gifts of attention that so many of us can give, and others will certainly appreciate.
As we at Iowa State University Extension and Outreach reflect on the holiday, we are reminded about our gift to the next generation. This video explains our efforts all year long!
e than twenty years ago my mother began giving me decorative ornaments. When I began to have children they too received ornaments. At first, I didn’t really know how to display them since there were so few. However, time flies when you’re having fun and suddenly this year I have a problem (according to my youngest child). I have run out of space. As I reflect on our topic this month, I couldn’t help but think about the ornaments. They may look like trinkets to most but to us they tell a story. A story of vacations, new babies, new homes, popular movies and even eventful mishaps in our lives. The ornaments have become a tradition. A giving ritual. At one point my mom asked if we still wanted to continue or if the ornaments were becoming a hassle. I confess to throwing a mini-tantrum at the though of not receiving my ornament. I have come to love looking at them and remembering with my family what the ornaments symbolize for us. I look forward to them each year and expect to continue the tradition as well.
